Sunday, September 5, 2021

R.I.P.: Harry Reems, Part XII: Final Misc. and Maybes

Way back in March 2013, when the studly and hirsute Golden Age porn star Harry Reems (27 Aug 1947 – 19 Mar 2013) died, we began our long, fat look at his tool career and films: a full 8 lengthy blog entries! (Links to each are found bellow.) And while length is almost as much fun as girth, by the time we got to Part VII (1986-2013) we were really ready to roll over and go to sleep. Which is why we never got around to finishing the already-started Addendums Parts I – 4, which looked at the films that we somehow missed or skipped in our extended and heavy Parts I through VII. And then we went and lost the stick we had our Harry Reems file on (a lesson learnt in backing documents up, that was).
But back in January 2021, while trying to distract ourselves from the Covid-related death of our paternal parent, we cleaned house in corners we had never cleaned before — and low and behold! The stick was found, probably where the cat kicked it.
And so, seven years later to the month, Addendum Part I appeared, much like delayed ejaculation: better late than never. Then came the relatively short but meaty Addendum Part II, the somewhat longer and fatter Addendum Part III, and the equally turgid Addendum Part IV. That thick entry should've been the last one, because way back when, we seriously lost interest in the undertaking as of the films around 1985 and after, which is why this Career Review sort of limply peters out at this point. But damn, as if we didn't find a thing or two while updating the addendums — and this definitely final entry is on them.
We dedicate all these rediscovered Addendum(s) to our departed paternal parent, who inadvertently introduced us to Harry Reems when we, as a teen, stumbled upon his VHS copy of Deep Throat (1972, see Harry Reems Part II) hidden in the VHS box for Key Largo (1948 / trailer).* 
* He also had The Resurrection of Eve (1973 / Purple Skies and Butterflies) hidden in his To Have and Have Not (1944 / trailer) box, but that 1973 film wasn't funny enough to keep us watching until the end.
In any event, here are some later discoveries, big maybes (as in, is Harry in or is he not?) and definitely-nots that are obscurely linked to the hirsute stud of yesteryear. There are surely more out there, but we'll let someone else uncover and cover them. 
 
Go here for Part I
Go here for Part II (1969–72)
Go here for Part III (1973–74)
Go here for Part IV (1975–79)
Go here for Part V (1980–84)
Go here for Part V (1980–84)
Go here for Part VI (1985)
Go here for Part VII (1986–2013)
Go here for Part VIII: Addendum Pt I (1969-71)
Go here for Part IX: Addendum Pt II (1972)
Go here for Part X: Addendum Pt II (1973-84)
Go here for Part XI: Addendum Pt III (1985-86)
 
 
 
The Erotic Starlet
(date & director unknown)
A mystery film about which we could find nadda. Anyone know anything about this one? Is an a.k.a. title of some other known film? A one-day wonder? An early Spielberg film? Enquiring minds want to know. But really, with such illustrious names as Mary Muffet and Lily Bo Peep, you would think you could find something about the movie. In any event, the poster once hung in (and the film was shown at) the "famous Apple Theater in Seattle, Wa., that was torn down in 1999 after many years of controversy and lawsuits between Seattle and the theater for illegal operating coin-op porn-loop machines with no license. [Worthpoint]" 
 
 
Back Seat Cabbie
(1969, dir. C. Walsh)
A lost film (probably) and a typical one-day wonder, even Distribpix, which once upon a time distributed the film, knows absolutely nothing about it. For that, the imdb claims the movie to be a directorial project of the unknown "C. Walsh", the mastermind behind Doggie Bag (1969), Sweet Taste of Joy (1970) and Turned on Girl (1970) — all of which, like Back Seat Cabbie, were produced by Leonard Kirtman and Robert Mansfield and feature the female charms of Janet Topaz and Margaret Leigh. If we are to believe the imdb, both women, at least under those names, appear only in those shared films and in no other.
As for Harry Reems, well: look at that poster — does not the guy nibbling on the breast at your lower right sort of look like an un-mustachioed Harry Reems? Could very much be… look at that nose. 
 Over at Savage Thrills, they reveal little of the plot (but more than anyone else does) with their "summarization": "Sex in a car can be accurately summed in six words: great in theory, shit in practice. Is there is anything less erotic than rolling over onto your partner only to find yourself cramped in a corner with a gearstick up your arse? Still, these logistical complexities do nothing to deter Gloria, the beautiful protagonist of 1969 film Back Seat Cabbie […]" (We assume Gloria to be played by either Janet or Margaret, but definitely not Harry.)
Dazed Digital has the same text as above, but adds: "The premise of the film is pretty self-explanatory. Gloria craves a well-paid job which allows her some fresh air, so she decides to combine her two passions — taxi driving and endless sex. It might seem weird, but the film is strangely progressive in its explorations of pansexuality […]: Better still, the film humanises a sex worker and dispels the harmful myth that all sex workers are either trafficked or forced into the profession. Gloria breaks this stereotype — not only is she getting fucked frequently on her own terms, the friendly lady cabby is even being tipped for her pleasure."
 
When screened at the Georgian Broad Ave Cinema, above, Back Seat Cabbie was teamed with Jesse Franco's Wanda, the Wicked Warden (1977). Starring Dyanne Thorne (14 Oct 1936 — 28 Jan 2020), the movie is pretty much considered the unofficial third Ilsa film (of four), and can also be found under the title Ilsa, the Wicked Warden. (See R.I.P.: Lina Romay, Part I). 
Trailer to
Ilsa the Wicked Warden:


School of Hard Knocks
(1970, dir. Unknown)
The imdb claims that the infamous Leonard Kirtman produced this probably lost movie, which was surely a one-day wonder and, like so many of them, is so obscure that even Distribpix, which once upon a time distributed the film, know absolutely nothing about it. Is Harry Reems in it it? Dunno, but the guy in the upper window to your left sort of looks like an un-mustachioed Harry Reems.
The imdb likewise lists one actress to be found in the movie, Laura Cannon (6 Apr 1947 — 17 June 2010), born Janet Lynn Channin, a capable actress and "the first hardcore porno star to appear in Playboy magazine" — photo below. She is also found on the poster, in fact she's in the same window as the guy that sort of looks like Reems.
To learn more about her, check out the Rialto Report's typically intriguing article, Fleshpot on 42nd St: Who Was Laura Cannon? where, among other things, they quote Harry Reems from his 1975 autobiography, Here Comes Harry Reems: "[Laura] was magnificent, impossible, and ridiculous. And I fell in love with her that week in Connecticut. [When they filmed Dark Dreams (1971); see Part II.] How to describe Laura? Laura was actually a princess — a Jewish American Princess, commonly abbreviated as JAP. She had a glorious Greek-goddess body and a nose job she thought was the most perfect piece of surgery in the world. She only fell in love with men who told her she had an exquisite nose, possibly the most exquisite nose in the world."
But to return to this film. If anyone has ever bothered to write about it, they didn't put it on the web. Going by the two film stills we found online, however, we would hazard to guess the movie is a bit on the let's-degrade-women side of things.
School of Hard Knocks did get screened in Pittsburgh in 1970, at the New Casino Theatre, which the Allegheny City Society claims was once the Novelty Theatre: "The New Casino Theatre was located — Just Across the 6th Street Bridge — and opened on October 18, 1966, ushering in adult films to the North Side. In January 1967 it became Pittsburgh's new (and final) 'Home of Burlesque' with its mix of action on both the stage and screen. Opening in 1918 as the Novelty Theatre and located at 217—219 Federal Street, it was one of three theatres that sat on Federal, south of what is today Allegheny Center." 
 
 
Lady Zazu's Daughter
(1971, writ. & dir. Eduardo Cemano)
A.k.a. Millie's Homecoming, this movie is not found on any Reems filmography online — but take a look at the poster, at the star directly to your right of the biggest star (the one with Tina Russell, who isn't even listed on the poster). That is unquestionably an un-mustachioed Harry Reems. So, although none of the names on the poster are known pseudonyms of his, and assuming that the people pictured on the poster are in the film, Reems would be in there somewhere. But, actually, he isn't… how do we know? Because we watched the film, like you can, here.
But since he is on the poster, so let's look at the movie anyways. The plot, according to some other illegal download website out there: "[The] life of Lord and Lady Zazu (Dolly Sharp) as they await the return of their daughter Millie (Arlana Blue, above from the film) from college. Lady Zazu is stressed out as per usual and appeals to her maid Hazel (Tina Russell) to soothe her jangled nerves. Upon Millie's return home, her besotted father, Lord Zazu (Fred J. Lincoln) staggers into Millie's bedroom, where — mistaking Millie's raised buttocks for his wife's — [he] accidentally slips it to his own daughter. Once recovered from the initial shock of their incestuous encounter, Lord and daughter realize that they actually enjoyed the experience and run off to tell the rest of the family!"
Some of the cast here (Dolly Sharp & "Peter Zotts" [Fred J. Lincoln]) also appeared in another 1971 film written and directed by "Eduardo Cemano" that featured Harry Reems, The Weirdos and the Oddballs, which, like this movie, was supposedly co-produced by an uncredited Doris Wishman. We looked at W&O back in 2013, in Part II, where we mentioned: "Director Cemano (a pseudonym for Ed Seeman) was an associate of John Cassavettes who, according to Robert Cetti (in his book Eduardo Cemano & Birth of the NYC One-Day Wonder), had 'a cultural background in Borscht Belt comedy [and] developed a reputation as a pornographer's answer to Woody Allen.' […] Wider Screenings says: "Cemano was fascinated by the possibilities of including explicit sexual imagery into a narrative feature — or, more specifically, introducing plot and character into an explicit sex film — and when approached [...] to make some original one-day wonders in New York to compete with the material sent over from California, Cemano eagerly directed two of the first porno feature films to emerge from New York: Millie's Homecoming aka Lady Zazu's Daughter (1971) and The Weirdos and the Oddballs aka Zora Knows Best. [...]"
Wider Screenings is now a Polish website and their article gone, but another site we quoted, SexGoreMutants, is still there and they mention: "'Both films [Zazu and Zora] benefit from candid camera-style voyeurism that at times achieves levels of minor delirium. The acting equals this, ranging from the comical to the manic. While never contrived, there's no mistaking that all of this is very stylized. Cemano had a distinctive vision, pushing for something more than run-of-the-mill. The sex scenes are not too well shot in terms of explicit detail, but they do evoke humor and warmth — two things you won't find in your typical Vivid production. This is human sex — all the sucking and fucking is enjoyed by real people (not plastic), totally into each other (not themselves), while Cemano's camera simply observes the intricacies with clumsy verve.' Aside from his porno work, Ed Seeman (Cemano), self-portrait above, who now lives in Florida with his wife Amy, was a successful painter, experimental film-maker, animator and glamour photographer — a regular Renaissance Man, in other words. [...]"
The illustrations above, taken from Seeman's Wikipedia entry, are examples of "security adverts from c.1953, from the 4th Infantry Division's Ivy Leaves newspaper, by Corporal Ed Seeman". 
 
 
Vild på sex / Bibi
(1974, writ & dir. Joe Sarno)
Released on DVD as Girl Meets Girl. Produced by Chris D. Nebe, before he turned to documentaries. So, is Harry in the movie starring Maria Forsa as the titular "16 year old" Bibi? If so, then pretty much to the same extent as he is in Klute (1971, see Addendum I): he might be in a disco scene, doing dance floor moves. As CD Man says at rame.net & the rock!pop!shock! forum, "Look for a guy who sure as shit looks like Harry Reems (look at the guy on the right hand side of that screenshot!) during the disco scene. If that isn't Harry, he's got a doppelganger somewhere in Germany... a doppelganger with killer dance moves!"
Sarno had by now already worked with Reems in A Touch of Genie (1974, see Part III) and the fiasco that is Deep Throat II (1974, see Part III) prior to jetting off to Europe to do a series of sex films, of which Bibi is one. (The "best" of Sarno Euro films of this period is probably his lez horror film that preceded Bibi and also featured Maria Forsa, The Devil's Plaything / Vampire Ecstasy / The Curse of the Black Sisters [1974 / trailer below].) And Harry also flew to Europe to work with Sarno in the director's follow-up film with Forsa, Butterflies (1975, see Part IV), not to mention to make two more films with Forsa for the director Mac Ahlberg, Justine and Juliette (1975, see Part IV) and Bel Ami (1976, see Part IV). So it is in the realm of possibilities that Mr Reems was around town and a dancing extra was needed… so he did an uncredited boogie as foreplay to his part as the nightclub owner Frank, of Butterflies. 
Trailer to
Vampire Ecstasy:
The plot of Bibi, also supplied by CD Man [again at rock!pop!shock! forum], to a film he claims "could almost be a remake of Sarno's earlier Swedish coming of age story, Inga (1968 / trailer, starring Marie Liljedahl)": "[T]he film follows a lovely young lady named Bibi (Maria Forsa) who leaves her home in the quaint countryside to hit the big city and hang out with her Aunt Tony (Nadia Henkowa) for a little while. Once she arrives at her destination, Bibi has no qualms whatsoever about letting her wild side cut loose as she devours any man or woman lucky enough to get in her way. Bibi, it seems, has taken a page out of Aunt Tony's book and indulges herself with partners of both sexes, which leads to an encounter or two that makes the alternate titling of the film a little more appropriate than it would be otherwise. Eventually, however, after Bibi has had her way with anyone and everyone she can, the Sarno soap operatics kick in and she has to own up to what she's done. You can't go sleeping around with as many people as Bibi does in this film and not get on someone's bad side or wreak havoc with someone's emotions…"
"Bibi is a welcome return to form for Sarno. Voyeurism, sexual coming of age, masturbation, sapphic delights, outdoor sex, and incest are themes and elements which Sarno had utilized before and they're presented here shot in dazzling color with a cast of German lovelies. Where the film fails is the writing. While Sarno's camera is an ever-probing participant in the sex scenes and the flesh on display is all of top quality (additionally, the sex is with most certainty hardcore even if penetration isn't graphically shown), the dialogue scenes between characters suffer from the stagnant delivery by the foreign actors. […] Sarno also creates some beautiful scenes of forbidden love and whispered dialogue in the shadows of the night, with sparse lighting and great tension. And you have to love the great German rock score, which thankfully doesn't intrude on the well-done sex scenes (another Sarno trademark: all the sex is "scored" with sounds of orgasms, heavy breathing, and other all-natural sounds of lovemaking). [DVD Drive-In]"
Gunter Möhl's Baby Love,
the title track to Bibi:

Finally: The End

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