Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Night Train to Terror (USA, 1985)




"I'm only trying to cure you... I'll protect you... No more pain. No more hurt. No dreams... Only healing in my arms. Susan would want you to feel again: human... fondling... alive... worm... waiting..."
Dr. Fargo (Sharon Ratcliff)

Night Train to Terror is comparable to a religious experience in that once you have had it, you can never fully explain it. It is a film that defies description and defies justification; it is simply what it is – sort of like head cheese or the writings of Daniela Steele, either you like it or you don't, but you'll never be able to convince anyone who doesn't share your taste that it is any good.
And good Night Train to Terror is not – it is simply an experience that has to be had to be appreciated, has to be experienced to be truly comprehended. It is, without a doubt, probably the weirdest and most unexpected cinematic experience I have had since the day I watched my first (and favorite) Ed Wood film, Glen or Glenda (1953 / trailer). But Glen or Glenda, unlike Night Train to Terror, actually displays some cinematic talent, some directorial finesse, some narrative logic and continuity, and an artistic vision. All of that is missing in Night Train to Terror, and that is probably what makes the film bearable – if not downright enjoyable – in the first place. It is arguably one of the biggest pieces of filmic shit ever made – so bad as to be a masterpiece of Situationism or possibly the most intelligent commentary on human existence since, dunno, Wonder Bread.
Of course, to call Night Train to Terror a real film is sort of like calling a painting by Pierre Brassau a real piece of art – it is, in a way, but not really; you could just as easily argue it all to be a hoax or a contrived fake. Night Train to Terror is an anthology film made from three full-length films – one of which was unfinished at the time that Night Train to Terror was cobbled together, two of which were in the can – edited down to the barest of possible necessities required to convey any basic semblance of continuity and then strung together with an absolutely inane framework and padded with some truly horrendous 1980s new wave rock and music-video dancing. As mentioned before, the final result is truly amazing, startling, shocking, indescribable, memorable – much like a ten car pile-up that started with a VW bug and ended with a mack truck.
The framework of the anthology film is a train on the way to Las Vegas in which God (Ferdy Mayne, best known as Count von Krolock in The Fearless Vampire Killers [1967 / trailer] but also found in films as diverse as The Echo Murders [1945 / full film], Where Eagles Dare [1968 / trailer], The Vampire Lovers [1970 / trailer], Gebissen wird nur nachts [1971 / trailer], Val Guest's ignoble Au Pair Girls [1972 / trailer] and Frightmare [1983 / trailer]) and Satan (Tony Giorgio, an unknown and occasionally employed character actor seen somewhere in The Godfather [1972 / trailer] and Foxy Brown [1974 / trailer]) sit in a compartment and argue over the souls of those involved in the three stories – "The Case of Harry Billings", "The Case of Gretta Connors", and "The Case of Claire Hansen". In between the respective tales, in one of the train cars further back a bunch "new wavers" in laughable 80s clothing sing bad 80s rock and dance around, unaware that the train is hurtling towards an accident. (In one great scene, some prancing gals ask the conductor how much longer the ride is from outside the train window.) Rest assured, however, the musicians all go to heaven...
The three films edited into Night Train to Terror, all of which enjoy reputations as psychotronic experiences in themselves, are (in the order of their edited appearance in the film) Marilyn Alive and Behind Bars (1992 / review elsewhere), Carnival of Fools (1983) and Cataclysm / The Nightmare Never Ends (1980 / last scene); the latter two were already around as "full length" films in 1985, Marilyn Alive and Behind Bars was finished later. Were the narration of Night Train to Terror absent, none of the shortened three tales would be comprehensible, but even with the narration the viewer is subject to some truly surreal and jarring narrative jumps – and good amount of gore and a lot of tits and (believe it or not) clay animation, too.
"The Case of Harry Billings" (or Marilyn Alive and Behind Bars) – the bloodiest and most breast-filled of the three – tells of a mind-controlled man (John Phillip Law of Death Rides a Horse [1967 / trailer], Barbarella [1968 / trailer], Danger: Diabolik [1968 / trailer], The Golden Voyage of Sinbad [1974 / trailer], and Curse of the Forty-Niner [2002 / trailer]) who kidnaps girls for organ sellers; "The Case of Gretta Connors" (or Carnival of Fools) tells of college dork (Rick Barnes) who falls in love with a porn-star musician (Meredith Haze) he sees in a porn film and, after tracking her down, with whom he starts a bonking relationship before finally getting involved with a club that plays games of death; lastly, "The Case of Claire Hansen" (or Cataclysm / The Nightmare Never Ends) tells an extremely convoluted tale of Dr. Hansen (Faith Clift of the great classic Horror Express [1973 / full film]) realizing and accepting her predestined role as the killer of a devil's minion (Rober Bristol – complete with cloven hoofs) once everyone else who gets in his way (including such popular cult actors as Richard Moll, Cameron Mitchell and Marc Lawrence) die. All three of the disjointed, edited "cases" are so inane, so insane, so weird that they do well to make one want to see the full films one day...
The script to Night Train to Terror is credited to Philip Yordan, who also penned the original three feature films. Yordan, who died in La Jolla, CA, in 2003, was an Oscar-winning scriptwriter (for 1954's Broken Lance) who fronted for many a blacklisted writer during the McCarthy era. As a scriptwriter, he began his career penning notable if mostly forgotten noirs and mysteries – such as Dillinger (1945 / trailer), Whistle Stop (1946 / full film), The Chase (1946 / full film) and William Wyler's Detective Story (1951 / trailer) – and went on to a period doing big-budget films before finally ending his days scribing obscurely inane trash films like Bloody Wednesday (1987 / full film). Night Train to Terror, and the three films it contains, is typical of his later canon – indeed, he is the credited writer of all three of the original films as well this anthology film.
The directorial credits, on the other hand, are divided between five names: the pornographer Phillip Marshak (Dracula Sucks [1980 / ten minute edit] and Space Virgins [1984]), Jay Schlossberg-Cohen, Tom McGowan (Wilbur and the Baby Factory [1970 / trailer]), the Greek Gregg C. Tallas (Prehistoric Women [1950 / full film]) and John Carr. Considering how the film was made, however, perhaps the name to which Night Train to Terror should truly be credited is Evan A. Stoliar, the editor of the film. He makes a guest appearance in one of the tacked-on scenes not part of the prior three films in "The Case of Gretta Connors" as the boy getting screwed in the park who is stung by the deadly clay-animation wasp and dies when his head pops like a pustular zit all over his female companion.
For a US production, Night Train to Terror sure feels Italian. Imagine, if you can, that sometime circa 1985 Bruno Mattai suddenly decided not only that he wanted to start doing music videos for bad pop acts and that he also wanted to make an anthology film using edited-down versions of three of his films, but that he decided to combine both in one movie. The final result would well have been just like Night Train to Terror.
Night Train to Terror was a flop when it came out, which is hardly surprising – what is surprising is that it ever even got a theatrical release. Since making its way onto the lowest shelf of the video store, however, it has gained considerable cult popularity due to its inconceivable ineptitude. Still, be forewarned that Night Train to Terror is best watched as group that is well into their second or third six-pack or bong round. You will find yourself either laughing hysterically or dropping your jaw in awed silence....
Do we recommend
Night Train to Terror? Hell, yes! Will you like it? Hell, no!

For your aural and visual pleasure, an extended cut of the main music number of the film:

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

R.I.P.: William Campbell


William Campbell
30 October 1926 (Newark, NJ) – 28 April 2011 (Woodland Hills, CA)

To say that William Campbell, who died on April 28th at the age of 87 at the Motion Picture & Television Country Home and Hospital in Woodland Hills, CA, was never a big star is a bit of an understatement, but for that he had an unforgettable and familiar face to generations of couch potatoes that caught his numerous guest appearances and bit parts on television shows since the early 1950s (he made his television debut in 1951 in the episode "New Year for Margaret" on the long forgotten program The Bigelow Theatre and his last acting appearance was in the episode "Chill Ride" on King Fu: The Legend Continues in 1996.) But it was his probably his appearances on the original Star Trek that made his face for most of us: in the episode "The Squire of Gothos" his energetic portrayal of Liberace – I mean, Trelane – is fondly remembered by all who ever saw it (including, one might assume, John de Lancie, the actor who played the reoccurring character Q in the later Star Trek spinoffs), and Campbell's easy smile also served his characterization of Koloth on the classic episode "The Trouble with Tribbles" extremely well.
But if Campbell never managed to gain a firm grip as an A-grade film actor, he did do a number of unforgettable and enjoyable films of the B-level, including at least one true low-budget horror classic and a few others worth watching despite their flaws.
And for that reason, here at A Wasted Life we feel he is a man to be honored.


The Breaking Point
1950, dir. Michael Curtiz
One of four films – after the classic Bogie & Bacall version from 1944 (trailer) and before both Wetbacks (1956) and Don Siegel's The Gun Runners (1958) – based on Ernest Hemingway's novel To Have and to Have Not, The Breaking Point is the second to last film of John Garfield (of East of the River, 1940), who, unlike many at the time of the McCarthy Era, had the balls to not name names and, as a result, suddenly found it extremely difficult to find work despite his popularity as a star. It is also the debut film of William Campbell as "Concho," a part so small that it never gets mentioned in any of the plot breakdowns of the films, let alone earn him a credit on the poster.


Inside the Walls of Folsom Prison
1951, dir. Crane Wilbur
Another film in which his part (as Nick Ferretti) is so small that that it never gets mentioned in any of the plot breakdowns of the films, let alone earn him a credit on the poster. But this message film is included here because it was written and directed by Crane Wilbur, a forgotten Hollywood director and writer who, among other things, wrote the script to and directed the Vincent Price version of The Bat (1959 / full film) and also was involved in the writing of numerous genre faves such as House of Wax (1953 / trailer), Crime Wave (1954 / trailer), The Amazing Mr. X (1948 / full film), He Walked by Night (1948 / full film) and Mysterious Island (1961 / trailer), among others. Also, Johnny Cash credits this film as being the inspiration for his classic hit Folsom Prison Blues, which you can listen to in the clip below. The narration of the film, by the way, is done by Folsom Prison itself.


The People Against O'Hara
1951, dir. John Sturges
Based on Eleazar Lipsky's novel The People Against O'Hara, this is an atypical Spencer Tracy film noir in which Tracy plays an alcoholic ex-lawyer named James Curtayne who re-enters the arena to defend a man, John O'Hara (James Arness), accused of murder. Due to alk and lack of practice, Curtayne loses the case, condemning the man to death, but when sudden (unusable) evidence leads Curtayne to realize O'Hara is truly innocent, he puts his life on the line to save him. Campbell plays a small but important role as the verbally adroit and manipulative Frank Korvac, the main witness against O'Hara, who claims to have been the driver of the getaway car... As good and as important as Campbell's part was, he still wasn't deemed worth putting on the poster.


Holiday for Sinners
1952, dir. Gerald Mayer
The same year that he married Judith Campbell Exner – who, as enquiring minds ought to know, later claimed to have been JFK's mistress the same time that she was supposedly bonking Chicago's Godfather Sam Giancana – William Campbell played the career-driven reporter Danny Farber, a man not above betrayal and manipulation for self-gain, in this dud of a drama about three old friends who get together for a Mardi Gras weekend in New Orleans in an attempt to forget their troubles. His part was important enough to get him on the lobby cards (below), but not to get his name on the poster (above).

Big Leaguer
1953, dir. Robert Aldrich
William Campbell finally makes it on the poster of this inconsequential film, of worth noting primarily for being the directorial debut of Robert Aldrich (and probably least interesting film he ever made). E.G. Robinson plays a baseball trainer, Campbell one of the various hopefuls – or less-hoping hopefuls, seeing that he character actually dislikes the game (smart man) and only plays it for the love of his dad. You can even see him in the trailer at TCM, ever so briefly, if you look closely.


Code Two
1953, dir. Fred M. Wilcox
A low-budget cop flick – cops on motorcycles chasing cattle rustlers – directed by the man brought you the science-fiction classic Forbidden Planet (1956 / trailer), Campbell's part as "Murderer" is minuscule at best, which explains why he is neither on the poster nor to be seen in the trailer at TCM.


Escape from Fort Bravo
1953, dir. John Sturges

Well, he ain't on the poster to this here western, but there he be in the trailer – he done went play the part of Cabot Young. Don't it jest look like a mighty fine film? (Naaght!) Tells the tale of a some brave Confederates trying to escape imprisonment from them nasty Yankees....


The High and the Mighty
1954, dir. William A Wellman
Although putting any John Wayne film (other than Genghis Kahn [1956 / fan-recut trailer], maybe) on this blog might seem sacrilegious, The High and the Mighty is an early template of the disaster movie in general and the airplane disaster movie in specific, and therefore must be included in the eulogy. Campbell, as Second Officer Wheeler, might not be on the poster, but he gets real credit in the trailer – a trailer so stilted that it almost seems to be a comedy. Aside from Campbell, another interesting face in the cast is Carl "Alfalfa" Switzer as Ensign Keim.


Running Wild
(aka The Girl in the Cage)
1955, dir. Abner Biberman
"The Stark Brutal Truth About Today's Lost Generation!"
Learn the truth and nothing but the truth in this crime drama starring William Campbell and no one less than the impressive Mamie van Doren (of The Girl in the Black Stockings [1957], amongst others). To quote Leonard Maltin (who?): "Tawdry, actionful account of young police officer getting the goods on car thief gangs." An early JD hotrod flick about a rookie cop who infiltrates a teenage ring of car thieves and manages to win the love a curvaceous blonde bombshell. Try to guess who played who... Containing the first credited film appearance of the great John Saxon, the film is also supposedly based on the 1954 pulp novel The Girl in the Cage by the forgotten crime novelist Ben Benson.


Cell 2455 Death Row
1955, dir. Fred F. Sears

Above is a scene from an unjustly forgotten film by an unjustly forgotten low budget genre filmmaker, Cell 2455 Death Row was his first starring role and should have given William Campbell a "real" career – but it didn't. Cell 2455 Death Row was the first of four books written by the convicted murderer-rapist-"kidnapper" Caryl Chessman (seen here in the B&W photo) while he sat on Death Row in California in the 1950s. Convicted of being the "Red Light Bandit," a brutal lover's lane rapist/robber of post-war LA, Chessman admitted many crimes but denied being the bandit. He was finally gassed on May 2, 1960, missing his last reprieve by seconds because the secretary executing the call first dialed a wrong number. William Campbell plays Chessman, who for some odd reason is called Whit Whittier in the movie... the actor playing Whittier as a boy is Campbell's brother, R. Wright Campbell, who among other things co-wrote the script to The Masque of Red Death (1964 / trailer).


Backlash
1956, dir. John Sturges

More or less William Campbell's last A-film where he receives poster or trailer credit, a "psychological western" in which he has a part as an unlikeable hot-shot young gun named Johnny Cool who adds danger and distraction to Jim Slater's (Richard Widmark) fatalistically-ending search for his father. Donna Reed costars as Karyl Orton, whose hair and makeup can impeccably withstand the worst the desert has to offer. Nice poster, no?


Love Me Tender
1956, dir. Robert D. Webb

The film debut of Elvis Presley, and oddly enough one of his better movies – possibly because his part is a supporting one and the movie is more or less a straight western with a few song interludes – one of which Elvis sings with William Campbell! Campbell and Elvis are two of the four Reno brothers, and aside from being the only "Elvis film" in which Elvis does not receive top billing, it's also the only one that ends with his death...


Man in the Vault
1956, dir. Andrew V. McLaglen)
"Forced Into Crime To Save The Girl He Loved!"
Based on a Frank Gruber novel The Lock and the Key, according to DVD Verdict, "Man in the Vault does not aim high." But any B&W crime flick film with a young and curvaceous Anita Ekberg in it can't be all that bad, or? Nice poster, in any event.


Eighteen and Anxious
(aka No Greater Sin and Young Mother)
1957, dir. Joe Parker

Featuring (in a small part) no one less than the original TV Uncle Fester (Jackie Coogan), Eighteen and Anxious also features the film debut of Yvonne Craig, fondly remembered by most of us as the original TV Batgirl, as well as (possibly) the debut of Connie Stevens, all to be seen somewhere in the background of this teenage pregnancy film starring William Campbell as the trumpet-playing stud asshole.


The Naked and the Dead
1958, dir. Raoul Walsh

For this film from 1958, the same year that he divorced his first wife Judith Campbell Exner, William Campbell was not even mentioned on the posters. Hell, he doesn't even get shown or listed in the trailer, while even Lili St Cyr (shown below – not from the film) at least makes it on the latter. Based on the book of the same name by Norman Mailer, the film has so much testosterone that it seems to have been filmed on steroids. Included in this list primarily as an excuse to include a nice photo of Ms. St Cyr.

Natchez Trace
1960, dir. Alan Crosland Jr.
Possibly the only feature-length theatrical film of television director Alan Crosland Jr. Campbell plays Virgil Stewart, who swears revenge when John Morrow (Zachary Scott, in his last headlining role) accidentally kills his father. Of course, there is a woman torn between the two of them. Nice posters – makes the film look like a David F. Friedman production. Herewith, William Campbell slid 100% into B-movieville and television.


Night of Evil
1962, dir. Richard Galbreath

The only known feature film of director Richard Galbreath, Night of Evil features both Campbell and, in a bit part, his second and now ex-wife Barbara Bricker – although, since the film was actually filmed in 1960, she was still wife-to-be when it was made. In any event, the film was released in 1962, the year Campbell married his third and final wife, Tereza Campbell, with whom he remained until his death. Night of Evil is an unknown and forgotten film described on Ozus's World as "A cheapie camp melodrama that unconvincingly depicts a real situation of the downfall of a vulnerable and luckless teenage female, who is a victim of a cold society." Anyone remember Earl Wilson? Me neither, but he introduces the film as a true story: naïve good-girl cheerleader (Lisa Gaye) gets raped by football star, is thrown out by foster parents, tries to use her beauty to change her situation but ends up marrying a sadist conman (Campbell) before sliding into stripperdom and skid-row poverty. Lesson learned: always do a background check before saying "I do."


The Young Racers
1963, dir. Roger Corman
"They treated beautiful women as if they were fast cars...ROUGH!"
First film William Campbell made for Roger Corman, written by Campbell's bother R. Wright Campbell and costarring Mark Damon (of Let Them Pray [1967 / a trailer]), Luana Anders and Patrick Magee... cast sound familiar? This was the movie Francis Ford Coppola was assisting Corman with in Ireland when he convinced Corman to let him use the same stars (minus Damon) and set to make his far-superior classic B-horror Dementia 13. Campbell plays an asshole stud racing driver whose bro (R. Campbell) keeps his wife distracted so he can sow his oats; Damon plays an ex-racer turned writer who decided to write an exposé – big accident later, Campbell turns out not to be an asshole after all and all's well that ends well.


Operacija Ticijan (1963, dir. Rados Novakovi) /
Portrait in Terror (1965, dir. Rados Novakovi)
Little seems to be known about this film directed by the Serbian Rados Novakovi, but seeing that he is also listed as the director of the 1965 horror release Portrait in Terror, featuring the same cast, one can only assume they are one and the same film – in fact, according to Tim Lucus of Video Watchdog, 1965's Portrait in Terror is simply a re-cut version of "Operation Titian" with William Campbell (and Patrick Magee) added into the new version of the film. (Wikipedia, on the other hand, says that both Magee & Campbell were involved in the original Serbian, Corman-paid production.) The new plot, according to Amazon, is as follows: "Magee plays a sadistic killer hiding out in a cheap motel in California. Campbell is a deranged artist trying to steal a rare painting..." Portions of the film were also integrated into the 1966 Jack Hill horror film Blood Bath, which supposedly never got released...


Dementia 13

For years Dementia 13 was always given as Coppola's debut film, but that honor belongs to the 1962 nudie cutie Tonight for Sure (review). But Dementia 13 is his first feature-length general release, and what a release it is! The atmospheric, well-shot and violent B&W semi-gothic Psycho-inspired horror film features a gold-digging Louise Haloran (Luana Anders, whose last film appearance was in American Strays [1996]) trying to get herself written into the will of her dead husband's mother before anyone can find out he is dead – but her plans are crossed by the rather crazed family and an unknown, ax-yielding killer. A truly great cult film, well worth watching if you haven't seen it yet and watching again if you have – which is why we have embedded the complete public domain film here (from the great Internet Archives) for your viewing pleasure.


The Secret Invasion
1964, dir. Roger Corman
Odd that William Campbell gets no poster credit seeing that he is one of the main characters, one of five "bad" men who have a chance to redeem themselves or die trying by crossing enemy lines on a deadly and impossible mission. Sound sort of familiar? Well, three years later Robert Aldrich brought out a version of the same basic tale but with 12 instead of 5 bad men who have a chance to redeem themselves entitled The Dirty Dozen (trailer).


Hush… Hush, Sweet Charlotte
1964, dir. Robert Aldrich

Roger Aldrich's follow-up to What Ever Happened to Baby Jane? (1962 / trailer), originally meant to feature the same two stars (Bette Davis and Joan Crawford), but Crawford bowed out and was replaced by Olivia de Havilland. William Campbell has an extremely minor role as Paul Marchand in this fun film with a killer cast, so he's neither on the poster nor in the trailer. The film is much better than the trailer, which virtually gives away the main surprise. Catch it the next time it's on TV; you'll like it.


Blood Bath
1966, "dir." Jack Hill
Trailer:


Full Film:


Two years before Jack Hill made his undeniably odd classic Spider Baby (1968 / trailer) and long before he made the Blaxploitation classic Coffy (1973 / trailer), he was given the job to recut and film new scenes for the 1963 Serbian production Operacija Ticijan. The final product was Blood Bath, which supposedly never got released but was in turn recut by Stephanie Rothman, who also added new scenes, and then released as Track of the Vampire. Thing is, although Track of the Vampire has been rereleased on a double-DVD (with Nightmare Castle [1965 / full film]), on-line I can find only things related to Blood Bath. The website Fantastic Movie Musings says that the film is "a bloody mess [and] ... looks like it was edited with a Cuisinart." Check it out for yourself above, thanks to Internet Archives.


Pretty Maids All in a Row
1971, dir. Roger Vadim
By this film William Campbell's film career was pretty much over; even here, in a small part as Grady, his presence is so small that it is almost a joke to say that it is of any importance. For that, Pretty Maids All in a Row, which stars Rock Hudson and Angie Dickenson, is not only Roger Vadim's first US directorial job, but is also a popular 42nd Street cult film written and produced by no one less than Gene Roddenberry on a bad day. At Oceanfront High School, where the young guy named Ponce (John David Carson) is a walking virginal erection, pretty girls are being murdered one after the other. Roger Elbert was quiet right when he wrote: "Rock Hudson sex comedies sure have changed since 'Pillow Talk'." The A.V. Club has a great, detailed review of the film here.


Black Gunn
William Campbell's last film appearance, and the second to last film by forgotten English trash master Robert Hartford-Davis, the man behind such unforgettable films like Corruption (1968 / trailer). Go here for a review of this less than exceptional but mildly diverting Blaxploitation flick.

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Short Film: Helping Johnny Remember

Helping Johnny Remember from ashleigh nankivell on Vimeo.



"Johnny is so kickass, these kids are wet farts slogging down cool Johnny who is the proverbial awesome majority of one."
Ashleigh Nankivell

This film seems to have been a mild viral event in 2010, which is also the year I assume the filmmaker Ashleigh Nankivell made her short by appropriating and then severely editing and altering the 1956 educational film Helping Johnny Remember, which the great Internet Archives describes as a "surreal social-guidance film showing the problems of a boy rejected by other children because he is selfish, uncooperative and domineering."
The original 1956 film is too long and boring to watch till the end (unless forced to in class, which I swear I was made to do in Alexandria, VA in the late 60s – or was it Lee, MA in the early 70s?), but Ashleigh Nankivell twists the excerpts she takes from the ephemeral film into a petite, visually disturbing and highly intriguing, surreal social-guidance film showing the problems of a boy rejected by other children because he is selfish, uncooperative and domineering – a film that, by the end, could more than almost be seen as a reflection of US foreign politics throughout most of history.

Ashleigh Nankivell, by the way, has a website of her own, lives in Brooklyn, N.Y., speaks fluent Spanish and likes chorizo a lot. She used After Effetcs CS 4 to redo the film, which won first place at the lofilounge.org RE/Mixed Media Festival 2010.

And now, for April 2011, her take on Helping Johnny Remember is the Film of the Month here at A Wasted Life. Enjoy.

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Night of the Comet (USA, 1984)




"C'mon Hector, the MAC-10 submachine gun was practically designed for housewives."
Regina Belmont

Night of the Comet is the second film of Thom Eberhardt, released a year after he made his debut in 1983 with the horror film Sole Survivor (trailer), an early take on the basic idea of Final Destination (2000 / trailer) and its never-ending sequels. Over the years, Night of the Comet has gained a highly vocal cult following, and enjoys great popularity; not only has it made many a "Best of" lists — including Bloody Disgusting's Top 10 Doomsday Horror Films in 2009 "for its 80s-era cheese factor" — but it also enjoys a full fan-run website all of its own. But all its popularity and good word of mouth aside, is the film any good? That would depend, really, on whether the concept of an end-of-the-world movie made by John Hughes sounds appealing to you, for that is the impression that the film conveys.

"Since before recorded time, it had swung through the universe in an elliptical orbit so large that its very existence remained a secret of time and space. But now, in the last few years of the twentieth-century, the visitor was returning. The citizens of Earth would get an extra Christmas present this year, as their planet orbited through the tail of the comet. Scientists predicted a light show of stellar proportions. Something not seen on Earth for 65 million years. Indeed, not since the time that the dinosaurs disappeared, virtually overnight."
Introductory voiceover

The just-quoted intro voiceover sets the basic situation, and when the comet flies by a few days before Christmas its corrosive dust basically dissolves everyone except for a few select lucky ones that happened to be inside and out of sight behind steel walls. That includes our heroines Regina (Catherine Mary Stewart) and her boy-toy Larry (Michael Bowen), who were busy playing bunny hop in the projection booth of the movie theatre El Rey; Regina's sister Samantha (Kelli Maroney), who took refuge in a steel shed after being decked by her stepmother; Hector (Robert Belran), who was busy singing a duet in the back of his truck; and an underground think-tank full of scientists (including Mary Woronov as Audrey and Geoffrey Lewis as Carter), who knew what the comet would bring. Larry becomes zombie-food toot de suite, but Regina goes home to find Samantha and eventually they run into Hector. Hector splits for San Diego to find out what has happened to his mother, but only runs into a zombie kid there. To lift their spirits, Regina and Samantha go to the mall and dance to Cyndi Lauper, and almost get killed by a group of zombified stock boys before being "saved" by the scientists of the think tank... as of this point, to tell anything more would require major spoilers, so for the sake of those who want to see the film, the plot description ends here, except to say all's well that ends well. (Those who want the full story, go here at Wikipedia.)

"You were born with an asshole, Doris, you don't need Chuck."
Samantha Belmont

To its advantage, Night of the Comet does definitely have a high "80s-era cheese factor", complete with big hair, bad clothes, lousy synth score, and typically pappy pop songs. Also to the advantage of the film, much of the dialog is both inspired and still funny, more than one scene is pleasant to watch, and one scene even manages to shock by totally going against all expectations. But anyone popping this thing into the DVD expecting a violent slice of 80s exploitation is going to be in for a sore surprise: rated PG when originally released, the violence and blood of the film is extremely limited even for a PG film of the time, and the closest it gets to showing skin is a short bra & panties scene (pictured here).
Night of the Comet may be an end of the world zombie flick in theory, but the core focus is much more on comedy and romance at the end-of-days. The zombie aspect is so lite and casually peripheral that it almost seems added as an afterthought and could have easily been jettisoned. The six or seven that pop up do look rather zombie-like, but they are less brain-dead undead than simple mutated humans; what is perhaps the most bothersome aspect of the whole zombie thing is that the film never clarifies why the good characters don't also mutate into zombies when everyone else seems to do so.
But don't let a major dramaturgical flaw like that ruin your enjoyment of the film for what it is: a pleasant little piece of end-of-days sci-fi fluff about two valley girls who wake up one day to find all of humanity (or at least most of it) gone. To that, the use of filters to show an environment ruined by comet dust is rather effective visually, and some of the scenes of empty streets and locations are frightening in a subtle way. The major plot twist is not only unexpected but actually works, but it is a shame that the "big" final showdown is so unexciting and lame. The final scene fits nicely to the overall humor of the film, ending Night of the Comet on a properly sweet note.
Final verdict: A sweet and fun little film, Night of the Comet has its flaws and totally fails as a straight horror film – which it was never intended to be. As a horror comedy, it definitely works best as the latter. It is, in the end, a pleasant little film that flits by painlessly and can easily be shared with younger, impressionable individuals if you ever get stuck babysitting.