Tuesday, August 23, 2016

Fortress of Amerikkka (USA, 1989)

So, here we have the sophomoric sophomore feature-length movie of (former) Troma film director Eric Louzil, the man who likes to claim to have discovered Kevin Costner, as Costner's first film appearance, Malibu Hot Summer aka Sizzle Beach USA (1981 / trailer), was a Louzil-produced movie (as is another early film featuring Costner, Shadows Run Black [1984 / trailer]). Eric Louzil went on to direct such famous, culturally relevant projects as Class of Nuke 'Em High Part II: Subhumanoid Meltdown (1991 / full movie), Lukas' Child (1993 / trailer), Silent Fury (1994, with the great Charles Napier) and Fatal Pursuit (1994 / trailer, also with the great Charles Napier), and Class of Nuke 'Em High Part 3: The Good, the Bad and the Subhumanoid (1994 / trailer).
Since 2004, he's done the world a good turn by giving up the directorial chair in favor of the presiding chair of Echelon Studios, which "oversee[s] domestic & foreign film licensing with a library of over 15,000 titles." One would be hard placed to say that his departure from the directorial chair has been noticed — but then, going by Fortress of Amerikkka, which he supposedly also wrote (like many of his culturally relevant projects), one would also be hard placed to call him a talented filmmaker. (A businessman, on the other hand, he does indeed seem to be.)
We caught the "Director’s Cut" of Fortress of Amerikkka, or at least it was so lauded on the DVD cover. It would seem that the director cut the film (and the film script as well, in all likelihood) with dull scissors, for it is a mess of a movie. One of those total turds that leave you astounded that anyone could do anything so bad; but then, were it a smidgeon better, it probably wouldn't be half as enjoyable, for the only joy to be found here is in the total inability that pervades every aspect of the movie, from the script to the acting to the direction to the cinematography — you name it. Fortress of Amerikkka is bad even for a Troma film, and as such is something for true fans of craptastic films … though, oddly enough, it is somewhat boring at times for a movie as bad as it is. (The "main" character has all the charisma of and less acting talent than Stephan Lack in Scanners [1981 / trailer], so any scene he is in verges on interminable.)
In an interview of Louzil found online, he claims that "I made about seven films for Troma. My second was Fortress of Amerikkka. Lloyd put three 'Ks' in it." We are sure Louzil objected. (Not!) To say the movie is the worst Troma movie ever made is tempting, but as there are too many Troma movies we haven't seen to be able to offer such a judgment, let us simply submit that Fortress of Amerikkka is one of the worst films ever made in general. It would make a perfect double bill with Empire of Ash (1988 / full film), a movie we couldn't help but think of when we watched the disjointed, illogical, badly acted & shot & edited & lit & directed mess.
Fortress of Amerikkka introduces characters at the drop of a hat and also has them exit the movie just as quickly, and within the narrative mess that hopes to be a plot there are at least a dozen or more strands that wallow about looking for a reason to be. Little is fleshed out, and that which is doesn't manage to create a sequential plot. One gets the feeling that the movie was once 20 hours long and cut down to its current running time, as so many aspects of the "plot" dangle loosely and limply in the wind, like the dick of a 90-year-old nudist walking down Main Street of a desert town. Yes, the movie is not a pleasant sight ... but it is fun in that road-kill kind of way: something so bad, so terrible, that you find yourself rubbernecking to keep it in view. (Admit it: you'd rubberneck too if you saw a naked 90-year-old strolling down the street.)
The "plot" involves a wimpy wanna-be Billy Jack named John Whitecloud (as Gene LeBrock of Metamorphosis [1990 / trailer] and Horror House 2 [1990 / German trailer]) returning home to "Troma Town" from jail to revenge the death of his brother, killed by the very sheriff (David Crane) that sent Whitecloud to jail. At the same time, a kill-happy troupe of mercenaries (the "Fortress of Amerikka") is camping out in them-thar hills and killing everyone that crosses their path — and, of course, the twain shall meet. Sconced within those two disparate and underdeveloped plotlines are multiple (major, minor, and mini) characters and events that never meet to make a story.
Whitecloud's brother is buried in a cave under a cross (are Native Americans Christian?); Whitecloud hooks up with his ex, Jennifer (Kellee Bradley of Frayed [2007 / trailer]), whose fiancée hooks up with Leslie (Karen Michaels of Death Spa [1989 / trailer]), the nicest set of real breasts of the movie. Back at the Fortress of Amerikkka camp, two black members get it on (she looks good, we gotta say) while there's a catfight between two ugly white gals that ends with the death of one while some Sinead O'Conner wannabe has mini-orgasms shining her rifle. Indiscriminate people die violently at the hands of the Fortress, and between it all porn star Kascha (Caged Fury [1990 / trailer / full movie] and a lot of porn) wanders around smiling and looking lost, letting her discreetly displayed massive and intensely immobile mambos point the direction she is walking — she surely was responsible for more than half the silicon turnover of whatever year she had her set made.
Fortress of Amerikkka is one of those productions that would require ten times the amount of time to list everything that is wrong about the movie than it takes to watch it. Any given scene easily has a dozen fuckups — in fact, the whole film is nothing but a collection of fuckups strung together for the 100-odd minutes of film stock. So, in other words: if you, like us, are a fan of film fuckups so fucked up that they're fun, this visual abortion is for you.
On the other hand, if you are one of those masses of people who expect a vague smidgeon of a similarity of competence in direction, acting, scriptwriting, cinematography, editing, whatever: STEER CLEAR!
Holy Mohammed, though: Kascha has to be seen to be believed. Does anyone really get off on silicone missiles like those? (And we ask that as total breast fetishists.) Or could it be the lips that make our weiner act like that of a 90-year-old nudist? For some strange reason, when we look at her and all we can think of is the movie The Graduate (1967).
Why we think of The Graduate when we see Kascha:

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