Crank Balls by Devin Bell from Devin Bell on Vimeo.
Monday, January 25, 2010
Short Film: Crank Balls (USA, 2007)
Crank Balls by Devin Bell from Devin Bell on Vimeo.
Witchfinder General / The Conqueror Worm (Great Britain, 1968)
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Valentine (USA, 2001)
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The script is less than exceptional, to say the least. Based on a novel by Tom Savage, it is hard to believe that four different authors were needed to cobble together a script as predictable as this one. Did each author have one idea and a five-word vocabulary? As it is, they did manage a script with a beginning and an end, some action in between and decent characterization, but to say that the movie is either halfway logical or believable would be a lie. But then, this is not a film in which the story should be closely scrutinized, it is a film to be watched only to see one person after the other die.
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Some 15 years later, not only have all the spurning girls involved developed into vivacious and curvaceous babes, but since not one of them has moved away they are all still great friends. As Valentine rolls around, they all get sadistic valentine cards indicating that they are not loved by all. After a date from hell with one of the red herrings of the movie, Shelley Fisher (Katherine Heigl) is the first one to go. Ruthie (Hedy Burress) gets it bad at an art opening, and along the way a panty fetishist and some other guy bite the dust, the killer popping up at the most unexpected places. It is at Dorothy Wheeler's (Jessica Capshaw) big party that the bodies start to pile up, as the killer is seemingly less bent on revenge than simply killing everyone he can. Anorexic wild thing Paige Prescott (Denise Richards) gets drilled and electrocuted in a jacuzzi, some pissed-off bitch gets her throat impaled on glass shards and a police detective loses his head.
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Anaconda (USA, 1997)
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Dr. Jekyll and Sister Hyde (Great Britain, 1971)
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Beswick, like another earlier famed beauty of B-movies, Barbara Steele, had a mysterious, sensuous look well suited for the horror films she starred in. Jamaican born, Beswick started her career as the generic female form dancing behind the credits of the first James Bond adventure, Dr. No (1962 / trailer), before moving upwards to speaking rolls of varying screen time in such films as From Russia with Love (1963 / trailer); Thunderball (1965 / trailer); One Million Years B.C. (1966 / trailer), in which she didn’t speak as much as she did grunt; Prehistoric Women (1967 / trailer), the seldom seen excursion into the innately camp prehistoric women/slave girls genre; and, eventually, her first lead role in Dr. Jekyll and Sister Hyde.
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From the opening strains of a truly beautiful waltz written just for the film, the high-class production values found in the best of Hammer’s costume horror excursions are immediately evident, and continue to be so throughout most of the entire film, excluding some questionable blood and gore effects that come across like the results of a ketchup bottle knocked over. Well filmed and marred only by the unsatisfying end, the plot of Dr. Jekyll and Sister Hyde contains a little bit of everything from the century in which it takes place: bits of Robert Louis Stevenson’s original story (1886), a bit of Jack the Ripper (1888 London), body snatching for illicit experiments (18th & 19th century in general) and Burke and Hare (1820s Edinburgh).
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The duel between the two ids reaches a pinnacle of sorts when Hyde attempts to murder the sweet young lady from upstairs who has such an innocent crush on our doctor. Of course, the not so good doctor eventually gets revealed as the murderer of those fine specimens of womanhood and the chase is on. It is this very chase that prevents the film from becoming a classic in horror films: ineffectually filmed and unconvincingly staged,
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In spite of any shortcomings it has, including its general less than frightening nature, Dr. Jekyll and Sister Hyde is still one of the better latter horror genre entries from Hammer Films and is more than fun enough to watch.
Les triplettes de Belleville / The Triplets of Belleville (France, 2003)
"I saw this movie for the first time when I was eleven.
Scared the shit out of me."
(scizophrenicpanda on youtube.com)
Scared the shit out of me."
(scizophrenicpanda on youtube.com)
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That Les triplettes de Belleville didn’t win an Oscar is hardly surprising, for it is much too an eccentric film, much to individualistic in its vision and much too idiosyncratic in its execution to appeal to the mainstream masses of the USA—and anywhere, possibly. Virtually dialog-free, the film is a beautiful, horrific, magical treat in which the actual narrative plays second fiddle to the possible visuals that the oft-dreamlike situations enable. Indeed, it is this oft-grotesque, oft-haunting, oft-hilarious visual originality that ensures that the overly simple story doesn’t doom the film. By the time the film ends oh-so-abruptly after 78 minutes, the viewer has been drawn in so wonderfully to Chomet's unique universe that the full-circle ending feels truly like coitus interuptus of the worst sort—why, damn-it, must we return to reality? I want more...!
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As an added treat, here is the music video that goes to the film. The song was written by Benoît Charest with lyrics are by Sylvain Chome; the version here is performed by M (aka Mathieu Chedid) and the Triplets of Belleville (the voice of Béatrice Bonifassi).
Ten Best Films in 2009
For the first time, A Wasted Life is putting together a list of 10 Best Films, in this case the 10 Best Films seen for the first time in 2009. In other words: not necessarily made in 2009, but watched that year.
Excluding the 12 Short Films of the Month, I reviewed 116 films in 2009, many of which I have liked, many of which I haven't. But among those that I have liked, there are some that I am truly happy having seen, having had the chance to discover for myself. And discover is the key word here. Among the 116 films I’ve reviewed, some were not new discoveries: they were films—like Django (1966) or For A Few Dollars More (1965) or Night of the Creeps (1986)—that I had seen before once or twice or thrice and chose to see again to review for A Wasted Life. Films like that, or like Combat Shock (1986), which I saw and wrote the review of some years ago, are not on this list as much as I think they belong on a "Best of" list. They were not new discoveries, they are old favorites.
All the films presented below were new discoveries for me, and as such, are the Ten Best Films in 2009. Actually, one or two are arguably not even all that good, but they were such a pleasant surprise (or so different than what was expected) that they earned their place on this list.
The order in which they are listed is not necessarily a statement of preference. If I had to decide for one film alone between the films below for this evening, I would probably find it so difficult to choose one that I would watch none and choose something I haven't yet seen. (Decisions are easier when watching in a group, for there is always someone who hates B&W films, Asian films, etc, and the preference of guests always comes to play when I choose a DVD for an audience larger than me, myself and I.) Therefore, I present my selected Ten Best Films in 2009 simply in alphabetical order (according to the English-language name).
Those of which I could find a trailer are represented by such; those with none, well, as you can see, they are represented with an image trawled from the web. To see what I have to say about them, the titles have been linked to the respective review.Enjoy my selection—and feel free to have something to say about it!
Adams aebler / Adam’s Apples
(Denmark, 2005)
(Denmark, 2005)
Deep in the Woods / Promenons-nous dans les bis
(France, 2000)
(France, 2000)
Deranged
(Canada, 1974)
(Canada, 1974)
Le quai des brumes / Port of Shadows
(France, 1938)
(France, 1938)
Psycho Beach Party
(USA, 2000)
(USA, 2000)
Shutter
(Thailand, 2004)
(Thailand, 2004)
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In all truth, I was initially indecisive between this flick and Sovia: Death Hospital (2009) which, although a student film, does display more cinematic talent and promise. But while Sovia is a very effective horror story, it is somewhat dry and totally lacks T&A. The Hazing might not be very scary, but it is rather funny and entertaining and does have portion of T&A on the side. T&A, like sausage, goes a long way here at A Wasted Life...
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